It's scattered! Pieces are missing. Scattered by definition is: found in various locations rather than all together.
Over time and through many relationships and unexpected challenges - our hearts have been scattered.
Last week's blog talked about the brokenness of the heart. Today I am talking about our scattered hearts. Broken by definition is: having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece or in working order.
We are walking through life searching for our purpose, meaning, and how we can make an impact on this world. In order to do this, we need passion. Passion is strong and barely controllable emotion. When we are passionate about something we move toward it strongly and barely able to control ourselves.
Let me give you an example. When I was in college and really close to graduating my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer which eventually led to brain cancer. I was a non-traditional student. Non-traditional student for me was that I had jumped the hurdles of teen pregnancy, boyfriends, and pell grant-funded partying. Yep! Don't judge - hear me out.
The passion (strong and barely controllable emotion) that drove me was driven by me trying to outrun my mother's death while completing my degree.
She had asked me more times than I can remember "Greta, how long you gone be out there at A & I State College." It was Tennessee State University but she referred to it from the generation of her times. I was not serious about finishing so my response was, "It is Tennessee. State. University. momma."
My answer was tucked away in the chambers of a heart that did not have the passion to pursue my degree. There were only embers - a dying fire. But let me tell you.
The spark that set those embers ablaze once again sadly was my mother's cancer diagnosis. I was in the race of her life. I was believing and praying for healing all the while I was quietly on a passionate educational quest to get to the finish line of being the first and only child to graduate from college before her death.
Hang in there, I am going somewhere. I shared this to show you what passion is to the pursuit of purpose.
IF YOUR HEART IS SCATTERED YOU WILL STRUGGLE WHEN TRYING TO PURSUE YOUR PURPOSE.
Every traumatic experience, breakup, backstabbing, front stabbing, loss, justice denied, setback, setup, denial, shaming, embarrassing and life-shaking event - has taken a piece of your heart and left it somewhere. So now you want to pursue purpose but your heart is in various places. Oh, Greta, that's good right there.
When your "best friend" slept with your boyfriend during yall disagreement- a piece here.
When he left after he found out you were pregnant and denied the baby so strongly it made you doubt if he even was the daddy- a piece over there.
When that loved one died while you were fasting, praying, and standing stronger in faith than you had ever before - a piece up here.
You were raped by him but who would believe you since yall had a kid - a piece down here.
After several years of marriage and fighting like a nat landing in a sticky substance, it still ended in divorce - a piece there.
You didn't speak up and now they are no longer here for you to tell them - a piece in there.
The sex was good and you knew he never loved you and now you feel stuck with a kid that looks just like him - a piece through there.
The sex was bad and the money was good so you allowed him to demoralize you - a piece here.
Ok, that enough pieces. I think you get the point. When our hearts are broken or even shattered it causes pieces to be left behind in places of deep hurt and trauma.
In order to pursue purpose with a fully functioning heart full of passion, we must get our pieces back. You may say, "Well Greta that happen a long time ago, and if that is the case I have done just fine without those pieces."
I would respond and say, "If your diamond necklace broke and the diamonds were scattered all over the floor you would be on your hands and knees searching for every single one until your diamond necklace was completely restored and every diamond was accounted for."
Your heart is more valuable than any gem. Remember from the previous post, it is our life source. People with no brain activity are declared "brain dead" and their hearts and organs can be still functioning. Your heart stops and...
How do we get our pieces back? Forgiveness. Breaking soul ties. Releasing toxic blames and shames of the past. Self-reconciliation. Creating or recreating our sense of self-worth. God-designed purpose. A heart renovation. A heart restoration.
So then we are walking through life with a disfigured heart where we have tried to put our hearts back together ourselves, using great surgical tools - Bible, therapy, self-help books, etc. But the condition of our hearts are so hard.
We need to take a spiritual leave of absence and schedule that long-denied surgical procedure we have been putting off. It is time for "Open Heart Surgery".
Join me back here every week and we will go a lil deeper but slow and intentional into some of the pieces of a program I created, Greta Be's Purpose-Discovery Program.
It is part of a more intense program, but for now, we will settle here. I will give you answers that we have had all of our lives to the questions that have held up back long enough. It is your time to be free.... free to BE YOUnique!
The heart of the matter is... YOU!
On a scale from head to toe, how much of you desire to walk in a purpose-driven life?